Cheating. Abuse. Finding out you’re related.These are all very good reasons to break up with someone.However, sometimes, people can decide to end their loving relationships for some real head-scratching reasons. I mean, I once broke up with a girl because she thought she saw two moons in the sky. I mean, I would never consider myself shallow or judgemental – but come on! Two moons?Today, Reddit has exploded after user, _thisiswater, asked the question, “[What is] the pettiest reason you’ve broken up with someone?” As you can imagine, the replies were a combination hilarious and harsh. Some were perplexing, whilst others were fully within their rights to end the relationship.You better sit down readers… Because we need to talk…
“He thought that clairvoyant was a person.”
“He kept calling me cupcake.
I am not a cupcake.”
“Friend broke up with his girlfriend because he noticed she was sweating.”
“She was house sitting and left the garage door open again. The neighbour came over to tell her. He was polite but firm that it was the second time and he would feel guilty if he didn’t say anything. After he left, she broke down and called her mother and cried for an hour about the mean neighbour I sat there and listened for an hour until I couldn’t take it. I said, “Grow up” and walked out.”
“Friend broke up with his girlfriend before christmas so he didn’t have to buy her anything. They got back together. Well, for another 10 months until it’s December again anyways.”
“I broke up with a guy because he reminded me of Ted from How I Met Your Mother”
“Back in middle school, I broke up with my girlfriend because she looked way too masculine in her yearbook picture. The picture looked nothing like her but I was just worried that one of my friends was gonna look her up in the yearbook.”
“My girlfriends father broke up with a woman for not putting croutons in his salad.”
“She had abnormally long toes.
This may be my biggest regret. She was nice, funny, obviously into me.
I just couldn’t stop noticing her toes and how finger-like they were.”
“I had a friend not go on a third date with a girl because he was put off by the grass stains on her sneakers.”
“She used the word ‘free’ instead of ‘three’ in a message.”
“We were doing the early 2005 version of Netflix and Chill. As the DVD was starting she said, ‘Are you comfty?’
I broke up with her immediately (by immediately, I mean 94 plus 9 minutes later).”
“We’d been going out a couple of weeks, went to a nightclub and he brought along a helmet so he could do head spins on the dance floor.”
“I broke up with a girl because she ordered a large blizzard at Dairy Queen and ate it all before I ate my small blizzard. And she said she loved me after three days…but it was mostly the first part.”
“She said she loved the Michael Bay Transformers movies.”
Okay, a wee bit harsh – but let’s face it, the Transformers movies were awful, croutons BELONG on a salad, and that “free/three” thing could have been really confusing if she wanted a “free-some”.
Break ups may be uncomfortable and awkward things, but they’re something almost everyone goes through, so it’s best to be prepared on what you should expect. Here are the 19 stages of a break up as told by the cast of Friends.